


Rays

by AParisianShakespearean



Series: Dragon Age One Shots [19]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Gen, Pre-Relationship, romantic overtones, saying goodbye, ships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-03
Packaged: 2019-06-21 06:54:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15552129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AParisianShakespearean/pseuds/AParisianShakespearean
Summary: Before sailing to Ferelden, Varric and Bethany say goodbye.





	Rays

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LadyNorbert](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyNorbert/gifts).



The salty wind was subtle, and the harbor waters were as murky as the grey sky. Isabela said the sea called. He must have been deaf to it. Perhaps that wasn’t too unusual—despite the fact Varric may have never been a typical dwarf, he firmly suspected sea would not suit him. He wasn’t sure that being away from home would suit him either. It was still what he had to do.

The seeker was already on board, while Curly took a few more minutes to prepare himself for the journey ahead. Varric would have thought he would at least be a little happy to be on his way home to Ferelden, but as he said, the “impending sea-sickness” that would inevitably occur was all he could think of. Sea sickness and all, Varric knew he would rather stand by him than the Seeker. He still had some time on solid ground, as the ship’s captain was still preparing. There was still some time, time to say goodbye. But Hawke wouldn’t come—it would be too dangerous. He said his goodbyes to her already. He may never have expected the goodbye to be easy, but he also didn’t think it would be that hard.

None of it was going to be easy. It wasn’t though he expected it to be, but inevitably there would be moments of quiet, moments where his mind would race and he would reflect, as he had been doing then before boarding the ship. Quiet moments were for writing. What would he write? The story of what was happening, surely, and his thoughts. Would he still be able to write, even though his muse was elsewhere?

“Varric.”

A hushed calling of his name made his thoughts scatter. There was Sunshine in the harbor. Not in the sky, but rooted on the earth. Bethany. He called her Sunshine because that was what she reminded him of. It suited her. Even in the Circle, the walls could not fully stifle her rays. That’s why he continued to call her Sunshine, but he couldn’t rightly say why he began to refer to her as such. Perhaps it was in her soft voice and in her raven colored hair and her laugh, and though she wore a cloak that covered her hair and had a smile that was sad, she was still that ray of sunshine he oft associated her with. The name Sunshine. It would always suit her.

Drifting over to him, she put her hand on his shoulder. He put his hand on hers. It was meant to be a comfort, and a way of saying without words, I am here, and I understand. I know. He wondered too if it was something else.

“Hello,” she said, softly. “Hello Varric.”

“Sunshine.”

Her cheeks turned a little pink. “You didn’t say goodbye.”

There was a time when he thought at first it was for the best. Goodbyes were never easy, as his parting from Hawke reminded him. How to say goodbye to Sunshine?

“I—”

Her hand flew upward, ceasing his words. “I know what you’re going to say. Goodbyes are hard. But it’s not a goodbye. It’s a ‘see you later.’ Alright?”

He was still ashamed. He should have said goodbye to her. She and Hawke, they were the two that were always there.

“I’m sorry Sunshine,” he said.

“I know,” she admitted, sighing. “I almost didn’t come.”

“Ah, now you insult me.”

The little joke made her laugh, and she tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. After a moment, her gaze wavered away from him. She made her admittance, low and soft so he could barely hear. He still heard.

“I wish you would stay.”

Yet even as she said that, why he couldn’t was coming into perspective.

His eyes found hers. “Sunshine. I can’t.”

“You can. You don’t owe that woman anything.”

He thought of remaining, watching as the world burned. Doing nothing when he could do something. People who wrote as he wrote, maybe they were inherently watchers, but Varric never felt like he was a watcher. He would not watch the world burn. He would stand by the fire and pour water, even if it was only a drop of rain. It may have only been a drop, but it was something.

He told it all to her. “Don’t you dare get burned,” she ordered, hands on her hip.

He chuckled. “Well. Sunshine always suited me,” he replied. “How far of a stretch is a little fire?”

“And yet you leave her.”

The bloom of his pattering heart was unexpected, as was the shift in the salty air. Yet the writer had no words.

Sunshine shifted. “Varric, I—”

“Bethany.”

“I’m sorry, I—”

“I’m going to still be here,” he promised. “Friends. You know. They never leave, not really.”

She must have expected a better line from him, but she politely smiled all the same. It may have even been genuine. Then again, the sun was always genuine.

“I have something for you Varric.”

There was a little tin tucked underneath her arm that Varric didn’t notice before. She pulled it out, handing it to him. He told her she didn’t have to get him anything, but she waved her hand, insisting it was the least she could do.Finally opening the tin, Varric stared at the gift. 

Once again, the writer had no words.

“I know you have many, many quills,” Sunshine said. “But I thought you could use a new one, to write your new adventures.” She beamed. “You do intend to write about them, don’t you? You have to. Otherwise I’d go mad without your stories.”

“You’ll still get them,” he said. “I promise.”

“I’ll be waiting.” 

His voice was soft. “I’m going to miss you.”

She touched his arm. He felt it like he felt the rays of the sun.

“I’ll be here,” she promised. “Sunshine is always there, even when you can’t see it.”

They embraced. And Varric tucked his new quill in his jacket, only taking it out when they were halfway across the sea, to Ferelden. He was halfway to where Hawke and Sunshine called home, and he wondered when he would finally be back to the two of them. Those two, they were his home. Sunshine was his home. And as Curly tried not to be sick, and as the Seeker brooded below deck, Varric observed his gift, and he thought of the stories he would write with it. He thought of the letters he would send to Hawke, and Sunshine. There was one thing, one thing he knew to be the truth. No matter if you could see it or not, sunshine was there. Not even their great distance could stifle her rays.

No matter where he was, Sunshine’s rays were in his heart.


End file.
